Wesley shot this photo of me on Christmas Day, 2005. I have always liked this photo, I like those jeans a lot. I can no longer fit into those jeans and my hair has a whole lot more gray in it than it did then, and I am not feeling as great as I used to. I will soon be at the end of my 50th year in this world, a half a century lived. I'm having a hard time adjusting to some of the things my body wants to do and some of the things I want it to do that it refuses to do. The scales are approaching a number I never thought would be possible, I need to make an appointment with the eye doctor, and thanks to a lot of rock concerts (mostly from Guns 'n Roses) I have to ask people to repeat what they said a lot. My child will be leaving for college in 14 days, I am mentally preparing myself for that and so far I'm doing ok. I didn't even cry at her graduation, pretty good I think.
So, I have decided, if I am going to live another half century I need to make some changes. I have given up caffeine, sugar, beer (not completely, just not every day at 5pm) and sweet tea. These are my over indulgences and they are causing my body to feel less than great. I have started doing yoga every morning, and so has Wesley. I meditate for a few minutes after that, have some green tea, home made granola and yogurt with blueberries and then start my day. I am also changing my diet. I read a great article about the most important foods for your heart and I am including them in my meals, if not daily at least weekly. They include: blueberries, apples, mushrooms, dark chocolate, red wine, flax, pomegranates, cabbage, eggs, almonds, avacado, fish, and garlic. For example, the past few days my meals have gone like this: granola with blueberries and green tea, blueberry, banana, apple salad with almonds, raisins, and walnuts, flax chips, quinoa with broccoli and mushrooms, baked sweet potato and snacks are almonds, cheese and my favorite a green apple with parmesan cheese slices and a small glass of red wine. I'm not feeling the need for an afternoon nap anymore, I am having headaches from caffeine/beer withdrawal, but I can deal with that, and I have lost two pounds in a week!
Now, I am left to think about where I go from here when Wesley leaves. I have been accepted into two great guilds this year and I need to work really hard to have enough for those shows. I think I know where my work is headed, at least for now, although sometimes that self doubt comes creeping in. There are so many potters around here that are so much better than I am, and sometimes I feel like it's ridiculous to try and compete in this over saturated potter's market. But I do make something that none of them make and what I make sells, so I guess I'm doing ok. This insane heat has slowed me down though. I just can't get motivated to go out and work more than a couple of hours. Mentally, I feel like I am in a good place, older, wiser, more sure of myself than ever. Physically, not so much. I have spent the last eight years working my ass off to become good at this craft and I have let a lot of things go, like physical fitness. I used to be a really good rock climber, white water paddler and backpacked all the time. Pottery is hard work, labor intensive and at the end of the day after working with clay all day, who wants to go to a gym? Gerry went climbing with some of his friends this past weekend, they were all in their 50's and one of them was 69 and they were climbing 5.8 and 5.9 routes at Moore's Wall. So. I am getting back in shape, damn it! I want to feel good for a long time to come and I am getting back into those jeans by Christmas Day this year!!!