Wednesday, July 10, 2013
Enough is enough
For the past ten years I have been completely obsessed with clay. Learning how to throw on the wheel, how to hand build, to mix glazes, sell my work, get in galleries, get in good shows. I even took a workshop on kiln building. I know a lot, I'll never know enough, and definitely will never ever know all there is to know about clay. But all this learning and obsession has pushed many things aside, including my appearance. Dirty clothes all the time, hair that barely gets brushed, dirty fingernails,worn out shoes. Charming right? I have had no interest in fashion or shopping and my eating habits sort of took the same path. I was shoving in whatever I could grab at the drive through on my way to the studio, or not eating lunch because I was involved with my clay. Well, I'm just about tired of this lifestyle and ready for a change. The hair brushing is still an issue, but I have been putting on some cute clothes and wearing better shoes. I just braid my tangled hair and no one knows the difference! If you look back at the photos of me at the beginning of this blog, you can see how the pounds have piled on and really in a very short time. I was around 135 when I started this blog!
Ten years ago, I joined Weight Watchers to get off some mom/moving stress weight. I was eating everything in sight and gaining a bunch of weight. I joined WW and the weight came off fast. I maintained that weight for a good while and then all of a sudden, I hit 50, I was obsessed with clay and the weight started piling back on. I'm just going to say it. I have gone from 140 to 160 in just a couple of years, and it is not what I want to look like. I have a small frame, and on me 160 is too much weight. I did that BMI test thing and it said I was OBESE! Oh hell no, I am not obese. but I am out of shape!
Enough is enough, so last Friday, Gerry's sister went with me to a WW meeting, and it was great. It's all such a head game, and the "conditioning" is pretty much a brain washing session, but bring it on. I'm ok with being brainwashed into eating right again and exercising. It's all about accountability for me. I bought a tracker at the first meeting to keep up with everything I put in my mouth, every walk/run/hike I take. That's the only way I can do this program. A friend of mine joined the online program last November and I agreed to do it too. She lost 20 pounds, I gained three. So much for doing it on my own.
I live for the "bravo" stickers, and the gold stars, and writing in my tracker. What an OCD case I am! I even found my "I lost 5 pounds" bookmark from my last go at this. And my tracker? I painted it and glued on a birthday card I got last year that looks about the way I have been feeling, and I carry it everywhere. It's just another art project for me! So far, I'm doing really well with this. It is amazing what I will eat when I know I have to write it down and be accountable for it, and know that in a week I am going to step on the scale at the meeting and I might get a gold star! It's brilliant. It's not cheap, but if I sell one necklace a week at the farmer's market it pays for my meeting that week, haha! not a bad trade off.
I feel really good. Wesley and I are going out every morning and walking these hills from hell in our neighborhood (hence the name Chapel Hill, I'm sure!). I am eating no meat, no sugar, no white flour, only fruits, vegetables, grains, and lots and lots of water only. No soda, no caffeine, except for one very small cup of coffee in the morning.
So stay tuned for the incredible shrinking woman photos to come!